10-11-07 MAJOR MELTDOWN DAY! The overwhelming paperchase has officially taken its toll. I sat here trying to make heads or tails of what I had done, what I still needed, who I needed it from, was everything in the right order, were all the staples in the right place (seriously, not kidding, a missing staple can ruin everything!) What needed to be notarized, what was able to be copies (and notarized as such), how many originals for dossier #1, #2 and the 5 additional copies.... WHERE THE HELL IS THIS CIS APPROVAL! I'm doing the "timeline math"... when I first started it looked like I'd be traveling in Feb.. 3 weeks there 2 home and 3-5 days on 2nd trip. Now that it took a month longer than expected to get my homestudy report submitted and this CIS pain... looking like traveling in END of Feb. Then I find out its not 2 weeks home but 2 weeks of the mandatory waiting period THEN 2 weeks for them to process the baby's paperwork (birth certificate, visas, etc). THEN go back for 2nd trip so now looking at not bringing her home till end of April! Ok, I know EVERYONE wants their child as soon as possible. And everyone is anxious. But I started this process at a specific time for a specific reason. In the business I'm in I can't be taking off a month or two when my busy season is just starting. So there's the stress of THIS time issue. Anyone that knows whats been going on with my grandmother, well she's not doing well at all. She's on 2nd round of chemo and dr's saying if it doesn't "work" this time, it could potentially leave her with a matter of months. She's saying to me "I'm ONLY hanging in here to see this baby. Is there anything you can do to hurry it along?" OH nothing like a punch in the gut. Its out of my hands. I'm frustrated its taking this long. And There's nothing I can do. I lost it. I called Don at the agency and told him I needed to come over. I brought all my papers and needed to make sense of everything. I started to tell Sonja (our director) and Carol (Social worker) what I was going thru. I started crying. They didn't realize my situation was this detailed and said they'd put another call in to see if it could be rushed. I spent the next 2 hrs going over everything spread out over their conference table and piecing together what goes where and what still needs to be done. There was no way I could have done it via phone. It was a huge help and I'm grateful that they always DO seem to be there when you need them! I went to my office and began the dreaded copy making. 5 full copies of the complete dossier... front and back, staples vs. no staples, correct order, etc. Feel like I made headway today.